Political Sketch Ideas, THE place for any political sketch concepts Options

[IreneSNL]

Because of all the scrutiny and press interrogations of Obama going on right now I would love to see a skit that goes similar to below where Hillary gets the softball questions and Barack gets waterboarded during a debate.

Mediator to Hillary: How much experience do you really have?

Hillary: Well, I have been a U.S. citizen for 60 years

Mediator: Wow, thats a lot of experience, definetly qualified for President of the United States of America!!

Mediator: Mr. Obama, are you a muslin?

Barack: No, I am a christian..

At that time, two guys come out of the crowd, grab him and hold him down on the table and start pouring water on his face simulating waterboarding and asking him again and again. "Are you a muslin?' and Barack keeps saying "No". After a few seconds they put him back in his seat and the mediator says

Mediator: Ok, we believe Barack is not a Muslim
.
Mediator: Hillary, Do you think you are ready to move into the White House from day one?

Hillary: Oh yeah, I have lived there before so I am obviously qualified from day one, I know where everything is.

Mediator: Wow again, you are so qualified!!

Mediator: Barack, are you really tight with Farrakan?

Barack: No, not at all and I already denounced and rejected his endorsement.

At that time the same two guys come out and hold him down and start simulating waterboarding asking him the same question over and over, then put him back in his chair.

Mediator: Ok, looks like Barack doesnt have any close ties to Farrakan...

They could even have a guy that looks like John McCain from behind saying something like. "Stop, Stop, I don't approve of waterboarding, Stop,.......a little more water around the nose...stop, stop....

Cruel (to the US) but fair and funny.

[bahramu]

So, I was sitting around (drinking heavily) and I started to think too hard about some stuff:

Waterboarding- I read somewhere people experience euphoria before they die, maybe which is why waterboarding isn’t working/torture. The terrorist are lining to get caught for the euphoria of it all.

Billy Crystal- is he dying? Does he have cancer? Doesn’t him playing with the Yankees sound like a make-a-wish?

[broke]

Characters:

Bill Clinton – Darrel Hammond
George Bush – Will Forte
Reverend Jeremiah Wright – Kenan Thompson
Geraldine Ferraro – Kristen Wiig
Far Right McCain Supporter - Jason Sudeikis
Michelle Obama – Maya Rudolph
Jesus – Bill Hader

[The scene opens to an empty locker room. Seated are five of the characters minus Reverend Jeremiah Wright and Jesus.]

Bill Clinton: Ya know, I could win this primary if Hillary would just let me back out on the campaign trail. I'll tell ya, this Obama campaign is the biggest fairytale I've ever seen.

George Bush: I hear ya Bill. McCain is about 2 Bush endorsements from the White House if he'd only let me go on the road with him. I've gotta really catchy tune about bombing Iran I want to run by him.

Geraldine Ferraro: Now George, we both know the only reason McCain is in the race is because he is a man.. If he had breasts he'd be selling depends to Fox and Friends viewers. Hillary shouldn't have rebuked me, I think I was getting through to the voters. They even sent me this nice hat. [Holds up Klu Klux Klan hood.]

Michelle Obama: [Doesn't see the hat]I know how you all feel. My husband made me come in here just when I had become proud of my country for the first time.

[The door opens and Reverend Jeremiah Wright walks in.]

Reverend Jeremiah Wright: [Yells out the door he just came through.] So you want me to go into a locker room because I'm black don't ya? You want me to play a little ball for you and entertain the white folks?

Far Right McCain Supporter: [Stands to face Reverend Jeremiah Wright] Hey, aren't you Barack (emphasizes the next word)Hussein Obama's preacher? Aren't you one of them Musleeems?

George Bush: Now now, Stereotypical Far Right Wing McCain supporter, I think if the good Reverend Jeremiah Wright has made anything clear, it's that Obama is a Christian.

Reverend Jeremiah Wright: Get out of my way whitey!

[The McCain supporter and the reverend both take their seats]

Bill Clinton: It really is sad that we're all stuck in here while everyone else out there is having fun. Do you realize how cool I would be hanging out with all the first ladies?

Reverend Jeremiah Wright: You'd do them dirty, like ya did Monica Lewinksy. (same line from Wright's sermon)

[Bill Clinton and Reverend Jeremiah Wright start fighting, soon fights break out among all the characters, and their microphones are dropped to a lower tone where only mumble fighting can be heard..]

George Bush: Wait a second. I'm a uniter, (pause for crowd laugh) and I can't stand for this. Why are we all fighting each other? We should come together for the good of the country, and help the best candidate to get elected,

Bill Clinton: You're right George, we should elect the one candidate that everyone could agree on.

[Other characters nod in agreement. A holy sound plays while the door magically opens and Jesus walks in. A rolling fog seeps through the door.]

Jesus: My children, I have come back to Earth to be your president. It is I, your savior.

George Bush: Finally, a candidate we can all agree on.

Reverend Jeremiah Wright: Wait a second. We all know Jesus is black. Who are you trying to bamboozle here?

Far Right McCain Supporter: Well I doubt the Muslim Barack HUSSEIN Obama thinks you're his savior.

Geraldine Ferraro: We don't need Jesus to run, we need his mother Mary!

[Another fight breaks out and their microphones are lowered again. Jesus steps to the center of the stage.]

Jesus: My children,... Live from New York, It's Saturday Night!

[BethS]

SNL should do a skit about Obamas spirtual advisor, the racist pastor that obama looks up to, the same man that married obama and his wife, the same man that baptistized obamas children, the same man that obama dedicated his book too.... u guys know the one im talking, the one that preached hate against america, saying america is reponsible for 911 and the spread of hiv and said "God D america" yeah yeah yeah... obama denounced him a few days ago, well i find it funny that obama has been friends with him over 20 years, but just now getting around to denouncing... sounds like obama got caught up and will say and do anything to get elected.. if it means lying.. thanks to that and tonight watching tracy morgan run his mouth with such bitterness, ill be voting for hillary clinton pa. so please snl, address obamas preacher in your next skit.. thanks

Reason for edit: Merged with similar thread.

[eddie3dfx]

Well considering whats going on in the media and obama not having the slightest clue to his racist preacher of 20 years, I thought a skit would work well.

Imagine rev wright in the pew with his sermon and obama and his family in the seats.
Everytime his preacher starts going on about 9-11 and white people, obama happens to either be sleeping, reading a magazine, or listening to his ipod. Maybe even obama's my pet goat?

You gotta admit, it would make a great mini-cartoon.

[ArtAttack]

so...okay...

If Bill Clinton was the 1st Black President, was Hillary the 1st Black First Lady...or were/are they an interracial couple?

Is she Black? and Female?

Obama is 1/2 Black..is she Blacker?

Would she be as successful if she were a White woman?...or married to a White man?

Was Bill Black when he spoke about Jesse after SoCar? or was he White, again??

Does Hillary's campaign, especially Tubbs-Smith, think Obama is an AfricanMuslim...or a Black Separatist Christian?

Is Hillary a Dove or a Hawk? Black Dove...White Hawk?

She was talking "Black" in a Black Church...what the HECK was that about. You could feel the Afro_American group CRINGE!!!

Karma Karma Karma karma karma Chameleon....

ebony and ivory...

Black is black...I want my Baby back.

Free to be whoever I want to be....

[ArtAttack]

HillaryCampaign Theme Song---

"Don't. Stop. thinkin-about my Hus-band!"


Obama "Not" Theme Song =)

"I'm the friend of a preacherman..."

Dusty Springfield?

[Oelad]

New Idea.... The busBoys

The candidate's bus is rolling down the highway loaded with supporters and the press

The candidate is sitting quietly, looking presidental.

The #1 campaign "boy" is sucking up to the candidate and singing the campaign message to the press team.

Everyone loves it, it's raining money and Life is good.

Routinely the candidate gives the boy a wink and the boy reaches out the window. An arm from the sky slaps the opposing candidate while he is minding his own business.

The candidate acknowledges the act, smiles quietly mutters "that's my boy", continues to look presidential and write jokes for the boy.

Suddenly, no one laughs at one of the boy's jokes. The falling money pauses for a moment. The candidate looks up casts a stern look at the boy who frantically cracks the next joke on the candidate's joke list.

Everyone laughs and money starts falling again. Life is good.

Another wink and the #1 boy reach out the window again. This time the arm misses the opposing candidate but does smack the opposing candidate's grandmother who falls an now can't get up as well as several bystanders.

Money stops falling, a shopvac appears and starts sucking up the money on the floor.
The press wait mill around quietly while taking cellphone snapshots of the boy when the boy is not looking.

Hearing the shopvac candidate, gets up smartly and goes the the bathroom. In the bathroom the candidate brushes his/her hair, presses a little boy button, farts, checks his/her teeth for food.

In the bus cabin a grapple snatches the boy and accidently entangles another boy in the process. Both boys dissappear. Seconds later occupants of the bus are nearly toppled when the bus is jarred as the wheels roll over something. The press are casually taking photos of something on the road behind the bus. Money starts failing again.

The remaing boys look at each other and clammer to be the first to greet the candidate when he/she exits the bathroom. The press pay the winner and place bets on the next boy....

[Carlapalooza]

So, let me get this straight.......
One day after Eliot Spitzer resigned as the NY Governor due to a prostitution scandal, the new Governor (David Paterson) admits he's had several affairs (Including one with a state employee) during a "rough patch" in his marriage? Wow! BUT, heh, at least he said he didn't advance the employee's career and he didn't spend any campaign or state money on the affairs (Hmmm....how about cigars purchased with that money though? ). AND at least he said he doesn't think he's broken any commitments to the people of NY (Just to his wife - how honourable). Ay yi yi! That's GOT to be good for some kind of sketch (Too bad it will be old news by the time the next live show rolls around).

[CMSGRET]

Obama gives great speeches but how does that slow, unemotional cadence work in real life. I'd like to see a skit of him and his wife having an argument.

[bahramu]

So, let me get this straight.......
One day after Eliot Spitzer resigned as the NY Governor due to a prostitution scandal, the new Governor (David Paterson) admits he's had several affairs (Including one with a state employee) during a "rough patch" in his marriage? Wow! BUT, heh, at least he said he didn't advance the employee's career and he didn't spend any campaign or state money on the affairs (Hmmm....how about cigars purchased with that money though? ). AND at least he said he doesn't think he's broken any commitments to the people of NY (Just to his wife - how honourable). Ay yi yi! That's GOT to be good for some kind of sketch (Too bad it will be old news by the time the next live show rolls around).

i think they could do mug shots fading into the differnt senators/gov/elected officals caught in sex sccandels over the last year... there would only be about 20-30 people. we sure know how to pick 'em

[Hallock]

I think they should do a music video of Obama singing Bob Dylan's Idiot Wind to a photo montage of Hillary. Listen to it, its pretty applicable.

[LisainSF]

SNL should do a skit about Obamas spirtual advisor, the racist pastor that obama looks up to, the same man that married obama and his wife, the same man that baptistized obamas children, the same man that obama dedicated his book too.... u guys know the one im talking, the one that preached hate against america, saying america is reponsible for 911 and the spread of hiv and said "God D america" yeah yeah yeah... obama denounced him a few days ago, well i find it funny that obama has been friends with him over 20 years, but just now getting around to denouncing... sounds like obama got caught up and will say and do anything to get elected.. if it means lying.. thanks to that and tonight watching tracy morgan run his mouth with such bitterness, ill be voting for hillary clinton pa. so please snl, address obamas preacher in your next skit.. thanks

I hope that if SNL takes on the Jerimiah Wright issue, they do it in a way that is helpful to race relations in America and not hurtful. I am tired of racism being used as a tactic in this campaign. The speech that Obama gave yesterday really has the potential to help move America forward on the issue of race. SNL needs to decide if it wants to be helpful or hurtful to that progression. And I am not talking about being helpful to Obama's campaign . . . instead, I am hoping that SNL can be helpful to the larger issue. I think comedy really has a role in the this process. I hope SNL has the tact and the intelligence to find a way to be a productive player in a discussion that could finally begin to get us beyond the racism that still lingers in America.

[Carlapalooza]

i think they could do mug shots fading into the differnt senators/gov/elected officals caught in sex sccandels over the last year... there would only be about 20-30 people. we sure know how to pick 'em

LOL! Ya, that would work - we'll call that "Sexygate I" then, in "Sexygate II", they move to Canada to become candidates for The Sex Party (Yes, it's a real registered political party based in BC)!!

[Carlapalooza]

So, let me get this straight.......
One day after Eliot Spitzer resigned as the NY Governor due to a prostitution scandal, the new Governor (David Paterson) admits he's had several affairs (Including one with a state employee) during a "rough patch" in his marriage? Wow! BUT, heh, at least he said he didn't advance the employee's career and he didn't spend any campaign or state money on the affairs (Hmmm....how about cigars purchased with that money though? ). AND at least he said he doesn't think he's broken any commitments to the people of NY (Just to his wife - how honourable). Ay yi yi! That's GOT to be good for some kind of sketch (Too bad it will be old news by the time the next live show rolls around).

Well, let's add Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick to the list. He faces a maximum of 15 years in prison if convicted of eight felonies, including perjury, obstruction of justice, and misconduct in office resulting from his alleged affair. He and his accused mistress, his Chief of Staff at the time, Christine Beatty (Also being charged with 7 felonies and has resigned), have been sending thousands of intimate text messages on their city-issued pagers. I wonder how his apology to his wife went over today at the news conference? Hmmm, how about a parody with all these guys: "How to Catch a Political Predator"? LOL!

[CaptMetric]

Here is an idea based on the hillary news today. Hillary apparently had a different view than the cameras when she visited Bosnia in 1996. Her view was that she landed in the midst of sniper fire and ran with her head down to the base. The CBS video of the visit showed her walking, smiling with her daughter and greeted by a little girl who read her a poem and kissed her on the cheek so........

Helicopter lands and Hillary jumps to the tarmac in a crouch, covered in camo and a helmet. The rest of the entourage looks like they do in the video, calmly smiling and walking. First Lady darts left and right, screams orders to cover into a walky talky and keeps asking everyone if they are crazy as she dodges imaginary bullets. The group moves to the girl while the First Lady is still in a haze of paranoia. When they get to the girl, the rest of the group hears her read the poem but in Hillarys ears she only hears her reciting a terrorist manifesto. The kiss on the cheek everyone else sees transforms into a threat whispered into Hillarys ears. Hillary dashes off in zigzag pattern off camera leaving everyone else shrugging shoulders and smiling at the girl.

[Alysung]

Skit involves Edwards being inspired by Obama's speech, deciding finally to endorse him, tells Elizabeth, who coolly reminds him he'll have to call Hillary first. They decide on a practice session, she playing Hillary.
The SNL writers can imagine the dialogue. "Oh John, I'm so glad you called. I just knew you were going to endorse me... " to "WHAT!? Judas is too mild... "
The skit ending with Edwards telling Elizabeth, it's really in the best interest of the party for me to stay neutral, and...

[Blargho]

So check out this sad video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y7NUNwq2MGc

Speaks for itself. I'd love to see a weekeend update "Really?" sketch about these morons.

[LisainSF]

I am thinking of a skit that has Hillary Clinton as Tonya Harding and Barack Obama as Nancy Kerrigan. Clinton tries to have Obama's kneecaps taken out (by Bill) right before he goes on the ice.

[broke]

I like the "How to catch a political predator" and "Hillary is GI Joe while everyone else is normal" skits. I think they both have the potential to be very funny skits that are more than show worthy.