^^Yes!

Wed, May 21:

When my mother was pregnant with me, they did an ultrasound and found she was having twins. When they did another ultrasound a few weeks later, they discovered, that I had resorbed the other fetus. Do I regret this? No. I believe his tissue has made me stronger. I now have the strength of a grown man and a little baby.--Dwight, on grief


The Pilot--13
Grief Counseling--8
The Dundies--7
The Alliance--6
The Coup--6
Michael's Birthday--5
The Secret--5
Office Olympics-5
Hot Girl--5
Sexual Harrassment--4
Valentine's Day--4
Diversity Day--4
Health Care--3
Basketball-3
The Initiation--3
Booze Cruise--3
Gay Witch Hunt--3
Boys and Girls---3
The Fire--2
The Injury--2
The Fight--2
Diwali--2
The Return--2
Business School--2
The Job--2
Take Your Daughter to Work Day--2
Conflict Resolution--1
Casino Night--1
Performance Review--1
Branch Closing--1
The Negotiation--1
Women's Appreciation--1
Beach Games--1
Unknown Ep (1/26-27; 2/12; 3/17; 3/20; 3/24; 4/2) --6

Grief Counseling

When my mother was pregnant with me, they did an ultrasound and found she was having twins. When they did another ultrasound a few weeks later, they discovered, that I had resorbed the other fetus. Do I regret this? No. I believe his tissue has made me stronger. I now have the strength of a grown man and a little baby.--Dwight, on grief



This was right before the stories about Pam's Aunt... and Mufasa

Yes, Grief Counseling! And as for today, I quote I am not in the mood for after yesterday's debacle (see Venting for those of you who do not follow my sad life story! )

Thurs, May 22:

I don't get why parents are always complaining about how tough it is to raise kids. You joke around with them, you give them pizza, you give them candy, you let them live their lives... They're adults, for God's sake.--Michael

The Pilot--13
Grief Counseling--8
The Dundies--7
The Alliance--6
The Coup--6
Michael's Birthday--5
The Secret--5
Office Olympics-5
Hot Girl--5
Sexual Harrassment--4
Valentine's Day--4
Diversity Day--4
The Initiation--4
Health Care--3
Basketball-3
Booze Cruise--3
Gay Witch Hunt--3
Boys and Girls---3
The Fire--2
The Injury--2
The Fight--2
Diwali--2
The Return--2
Business School--2
The Job--2
Take Your Daughter to Work Day--2
Conflict Resolution--1
Casino Night--1
Performance Review--1
Branch Closing--1
The Negotiation--1
Women's Appreciation--1
Beach Games--1
Unknown Ep (1/26-27; 2/12; 3/17; 3/20; 3/24; 4/2) --6

Take your Daughter to work day

(Yeah Michael isnt really clued in is he?)

How early do you have to get up to play this game? Good grief! (just ask Charlie Brown)

They're adults, for God's sake

That line always cracks me up!!

^^Yes, TYDTWD!

Fri, May 23:

Security in this office park is a joke. Last year, I put my spud gun in a duffel bag and came to work. And I sat here the whole day with a rifle that fires potatoes. Can you imagine if I was deranged? --Dwight

This is missing the funniest part of the quote, in my opinion.

The Pilot--13
Grief Counseling--8
The Dundies--7
The Alliance--6
The Coup--6
Michael's Birthday--5
The Secret--5
Office Olympics-5
Hot Girl--5
Sexual Harrassment--4
Valentine's Day--4
Diversity Day--4
The Initiation--4
Health Care--3
Basketball-3
Booze Cruise--3
Gay Witch Hunt--3
Boys and Girls---3
Take Your Daughter to Work Day--3
The Fire--2
The Injury--2
The Fight--2
Diwali--2
The Return--2
Business School--2
The Job--2
Conflict Resolution--1
Casino Night--1
Performance Review--1
Branch Closing--1
The Negotiation--1
Women's Appreciation--1
Beach Games--1
Unknown Ep (1/26-27; 2/12; 3/17; 3/20; 3/24; 4/2) --6

One of my favorite quotes from Conflict Resolution - and Dwight, no, I can't imagine what it would be like if you were deranged.

^^^Yes!

Sat/Sun
May 24/25:

Productivity is important but how can I be productive if I have this one little thing in my brain? That I cannot get out. And that one little thing is a soft pretzel. So I'm just going to have my soft pretzel, then I'll get to work, and I'll be super productive. Look out for me!--Michael

The Pilot--13
Grief Counseling--8
The Dundies--7
The Alliance--6
The Coup--6
Michael's Birthday--5
The Secret--5
Office Olympics-5
Hot Girl--5
Sexual Harrassment--4
Valentine's Day--4
Diversity Day--4
The Initiation--4
Health Care--3
Basketball-3
Booze Cruise--3
Gay Witch Hunt--3
Boys and Girls---3
Take Your Daughter to Work Day--3
The Fire--2
The Injury--2
The Fight--2
Diwali--2
The Return--2
Business School--2
The Job--2
Conflict Resolution--2
Casino Night--1
Performance Review--1
Branch Closing--1
The Negotiation--1
Women's Appreciation--1
Beach Games--1
Unknown Ep (1/26-27; 2/12; 3/17; 3/20; 3/24; 4/2) --6

The Initiation (and who knew that Stanley could get up that fast from his desk? )

^^Yes!

Mon May 26: (someone woke up before me and turned the page on the calendar-jerk )

Oscar visited Mexico when he was five to attend his great-grandmother's funeral. What does that mean to a United States law enforcement officer? He's a potential drug mule.--Dwight

The Pilot--13
Grief Counseling--8
The Dundies--7
The Alliance--6
The Coup--6
Michael's Birthday--5
The Secret--5
Office Olympics-5
Hot Girl--5
The Initiation--5
Sexual Harrassment--4
Valentine's Day--4
Diversity Day--4
Health Care--3
Basketball-3
Booze Cruise--3
Gay Witch Hunt--3
Boys and Girls---3
Take Your Daughter to Work Day--3
The Fire--2
The Injury--2
The Fight--2
Diwali--2
The Return--2
Business School--2
The Job--2
Conflict Resolution--2
Casino Night--1
Performance Review--1
Branch Closing--1
The Negotiation--1
Women's Appreciation--1
Beach Games--1
Unknown Ep (1/26-27; 2/12; 3/17; 3/20; 3/24; 4/2) --6

Have you ever . . . pooped a balloon?

Drug Testing!!

^^Yes! Today's is a very recent repeat.

Tues, May 27:

Smells pretty bad, doesn't it?....It's called bull crap. And a client can smell it from a mile away.--Dwight, on Ryan's first sales call.

The Pilot--13
Grief Counseling--8
The Dundies--7
The Alliance--6
The Coup--6
The Initiation--5
Michael's Birthday--5
The Secret--5
Office Olympics-5
Hot Girl--5
Sexual Harrassment--4
Valentine's Day--4
Diversity Day--4
Health Care--3
Basketball-3
Booze Cruise--3
Gay Witch Hunt--3
Boys and Girls---3
Take Your Daughter to Work Day--3
The Fire--2
The Injury--2
The Fight--2
Diwali--2
The Return--2
Business School--2
The Job--2
Conflict Resolution--2
Drug Testing--1
Casino Night--1
Performance Review--1
Branch Closing--1
The Negotiation--1
Women's Appreciation--1
Beach Games--1
Unknown Ep (1/26-27; 2/12; 3/17; 3/20; 3/24; 4/2) --6

The Initiation has been getting a lot lately.

Yeah, I don't know why. In the beginning it was The Pilot a lot, and I think I realized why. If someone is only a casual viewer of the show, but somehow got the calendar, a lot of funny quotes from the first episode may make them tune into the show. That's my Pilot theory.

I don't have an Initiation or Grief Counseling theory, though!

It's kinda of odd, too, because of all the quotes that have been re-hashed and re-used and have basically altered every flan's vocabulary ( ), I wouldn't think that a lot of them come from The Initiation or Grief Counseling. (The Pilot, I understand, though)

:Shrugs: Who knows.

Yes, yesterday was The Initiation.

Wed, May 28:

Word of advice: Unbutton that top button. Let those things breathe.--Michael, to Pam going on a date.

The Pilot--13
Grief Counseling--8
The Dundies--7
The Alliance--6
The Coup--6
The Initiation--6
Michael's Birthday--5
The Secret--5
Office Olympics-5
Hot Girl--5
Sexual Harrassment--4
Valentine's Day--4
Diversity Day--4
Health Care--3
Basketball-3
Booze Cruise--3
Gay Witch Hunt--3
Boys and Girls---3
Take Your Daughter to Work Day--3
The Fire--2
The Injury--2
The Fight--2
Diwali--2
The Return--2
Business School--2
The Job--2
Conflict Resolution--2
Drug Testing--1
Casino Night--1
Performance Review--1
Branch Closing--1
The Negotiation--1
Women's Appreciation--1
Beach Games--1
Unknown Ep (1/26-27; 2/12; 3/17; 3/20; 3/24; 4/2) --6

I finally am awake early enough to get to play!
It's a booze fueled, sex romp...
The Convention

^^^Yes!

Thurs, May 29:

Would I rather be feared or loved? Um, easy. Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.--Michael

The Pilot--13
Grief Counseling--8
The Dundies--7
The Alliance--6
The Coup--6
The Initiation--6
Michael's Birthday--5
The Secret--5
Office Olympics-5
Hot Girl--5
Sexual Harrassment--4
Valentine's Day--4
Diversity Day--4
Health Care--3
Basketball-3
Booze Cruise--3
Gay Witch Hunt--3
Boys and Girls---3
Take Your Daughter to Work Day--3
The Fire--2
The Injury--2
The Fight--2
Diwali--2
The Return--2
Business School--2
The Job--2
Conflict Resolution--2
Drug Testing--1
Casino Night--1
Performance Review--1
Branch Closing--1
The Convention--1
The Negotiation--1
Women's Appreciation--1
Beach Games--1
Unknown Ep (1/26-27; 2/12; 3/17; 3/20; 3/24; 4/2) --6

I believe this is Michael discussing "The Fight" where he whooped up on Dwight at the dojo, while Ian looked on.
My favorite part of that episode is when Jim says something about, "no...advice sounds like this: Don't bring your purple belt to work where someone might steal it." (very bad paraphrase, I'm sure.)

Yes it is!

I always go to Office Quotes for help with these! And when I am bored at work I re-read my favorite episodes!

I sometimes wish I could delete my posts. :-P

BTW, I love that last quote.

^^Yes--The Fight!

Fri, May 30:

I hate it when people don't tell each other why they're angry. My dad was like that. I would say, "What's wrong, Dad? What's wrong, Dad? What's wrong, Dad? What's wrong, Dad? What's wrong, Dad? What's wrong, Dad?" Over and over and over. And he would just look at me like I was an idiot.--Michael

The Pilot--13
Grief Counseling--8
The Dundies--7
The Alliance--6
The Coup--6
The Initiation--6
Michael's Birthday--5
The Secret--5
Office Olympics-5
Hot Girl--5
Sexual Harrassment--4
Valentine's Day--4
Diversity Day--4
Health Care--3
Basketball-3
Booze Cruise--3
Gay Witch Hunt--3
Boys and Girls---3
Take Your Daughter to Work Day--3
The Fight-3
The Fire--2
The Injury--2
Diwali--2
The Return--2
Business School--2
The Job--2
Conflict Resolution--2
Drug Testing--1
Casino Night--1
Performance Review--1
Branch Closing--1
The Convention--1
The Negotiation--1
Women's Appreciation--1
Beach Games--1
Unknown Ep (1/26-27; 2/12; 3/17; 3/20; 3/24; 4/2) --6

Okay, yesterday's was Conflict Resolution. Today I am going to type exactly as the calendar has it. There seems to be a problem with this one.

Sat/Sun
May 31/ June 1:

They took my card away because I spent eight bucks at a magic shop. What they don't understand is that I bought the stuff to impress potential clients. So, business-related. Using magic is an effective sales technique...I put a cigarette through a freaking quarter!...And guess what...they almost bought from us.--Michael

The Pilot--13
Grief Counseling--8
The Dundies--7
The Alliance--6
The Coup--6
The Initiation--6
Michael's Birthday--5
The Secret--5
Office Olympics-5
Hot Girl--5
Sexual Harrassment--4
Valentine's Day--4
Diversity Day--4
Health Care--3
Basketball-3
Booze Cruise--3
Gay Witch Hunt--3
Boys and Girls---3
Take Your Daughter to Work Day--3
The Fight-3
Conflict Resolution--3
The Fire--2
The Injury--2
Diwali--2
The Return--2
Business School--2
The Job--2
Drug Testing--1
Casino Night--1
Performance Review--1
Branch Closing--1
The Convention--1
The Negotiation--1
Women's Appreciation--1
Beach Games--1
Unknown Ep (1/26-27; 2/12; 3/17; 3/20; 3/24; 4/2) --6

I think that's from "The Secret," when Michael tries to get reimbursed for taking Jim out to lunch at Hooters.
But it should be "eighty dollars" that he spent at the magic store, not eight.

Am I right, am I right, am I right???

Yes! Right on all counts!!!

Thank you. You are a gentleman and a scholar.

Mon, June 2:

I can't be around carbs today. Do you have any idea what a simple loaf of bread would do to my abs?--Michael

The Pilot--13
Grief Counseling--8
The Dundies--7
The Alliance--6
The Coup--6
The Initiation--6
The Secret--6
Michael's Birthday--5
Office Olympics-5
Hot Girl--5
Sexual Harrassment--4
Valentine's Day--4
Diversity Day--4
Health Care--3
Basketball-3
Booze Cruise--3
Gay Witch Hunt--3
Boys and Girls---3
Take Your Daughter to Work Day--3
The Fight-3
Conflict Resolution--3
The Fire--2
The Injury--2
Diwali--2
The Return--2
Business School--2
The Job--2
Drug Testing--1
Casino Night--1
Performance Review--1
Branch Closing--1
The Convention--1
The Negotiation--1
Women's Appreciation--1
Beach Games--1
Unknown Ep (1/26-27; 2/12; 3/17; 3/20; 3/24; 4/2) --6

Wow! I can honestly say I have never heard that one before. I know Michael's talked about carbs before, both on the aired episode and in deleted scenes, but I really don't remember that one. I can only guess that it's from Season 2, but I have no idea what episode.

My guess would be Office Olympics- but I don't remember that exact quote from any episode.....

Yes, it is a Season 2 deleted scene. I had never heard of it either and was actually pretty sure that it was going to be another mistake, but it is from an episode.

Tune in tomorrow at 5:40am for the big reveal!

Yesterday's was.....The Client!

Tues, June 3:

I like fake boobs. Oftentimes you find them on strippers. They're very expensive. If I was a stripper I would just get one done first. Let the one pay for the other.--Kevin

The Pilot--13
Grief Counseling--8
The Dundies--7
The Alliance--6
The Coup--6
The Initiation--6
The Secret--6
Michael's Birthday--5
Office Olympics-5
Hot Girl--5
Sexual Harrassment--4
Valentine's Day--4
Diversity Day--4
Health Care--3
Basketball-3
Booze Cruise--3
Gay Witch Hunt--3
Boys and Girls---3
Take Your Daughter to Work Day--3
The Fight-3
Conflict Resolution--3
The Fire--2
The Injury--2
Diwali--2
The Return--2
Business School--2
The Job--2
The Client--1
Drug Testing--1
Casino Night--1
Performance Review--1
Branch Closing--1
The Convention--1
The Negotiation--1
Women's Appreciation--1
Beach Games--1
Unknown Ep (1/26-27; 2/12; 3/17; 3/20; 3/24; 4/2) --6

Yesterday's was The Job, with some extra lines thrown in. And apparently, the same goes for today:

Wed, June 4:

There's a reason comedy clubs have a two-drink minimum. I mean Seinfeld is a really funny stand-up if you're drunk in a club. If you had to watch him sober in your living room, I doubt it would work.--Michael

The Pilot--13
Grief Counseling--8
The Dundies--7
The Alliance--6
The Coup--6
The Initiation--6
The Secret--6
Michael's Birthday--5
Office Olympics-5
Hot Girl--5
Sexual Harrassment--4
Valentine's Day--4
Diversity Day--4
Health Care--3
Basketball-3
Booze Cruise--3
Gay Witch Hunt--3
Boys and Girls---3
Take Your Daughter to Work Day--3
The Fight-3
Conflict Resolution--3
The Job--3
The Fire--2
The Injury--2
Diwali--2
The Return--2
Business School--2
The Client--1
Drug Testing--1
Casino Night--1
Performance Review--1
Branch Closing--1
The Convention--1
The Negotiation--1
Women's Appreciation--1
Beach Games--1
Unknown Ep (1/26-27; 2/12; 3/17; 3/20; 3/24; 4/2) --6

Bubble, this is your favorite thread? Aww....

I thought for sure you would say the Movie thread!

The Dundies! (But only the first sentence is correct ) I love how worried Michael looks in that talking head


Well this is one of my favorite Office related threads.

^^Yes, The Dundies! And today we appear to have a similar half-true, half-not quote:

Thurs, June 5:

Being a salesman, I have an acute ability to read people. I can pick up on the subtlest little detail--is his pulse racing in his neck artery? That means he is nervous or happy. Does he lean backward? That means he is either confident or nervous.--Dwight

The Pilot--13
Grief Counseling--8
The Dundies--8
The Alliance--6
The Coup--6
The Initiation--6
The Secret--6
Michael's Birthday--5
Office Olympics-5
Hot Girl--5
Sexual Harrassment--4
Valentine's Day--4
Diversity Day--4
Health Care--3
Basketball-3
Booze Cruise--3
Gay Witch Hunt--3
Boys and Girls---3
Take Your Daughter to Work Day--3
The Fight-3
Conflict Resolution--3
The Job--3
The Fire--2
The Injury--2
Diwali--2
The Return--2
Business School--2
The Client--1
Drug Testing--1
Casino Night--1
Performance Review--1
Branch Closing--1
The Convention--1
The Negotiation--1
Women's Appreciation--1
Beach Games--1
Unknown Ep (1/26-27; 2/12; 3/17; 3/20; 3/24; 4/2) --6

^^Yesterday's was Casino Night--with a little extra thrown in.

Fri, June 6:

Michael and his jeans. he gets in them and I'm not exactly sure what happens. I only know he loves the way he looks in those jeans. I know they're why he started casual Fridays.---Pam

The Pilot--13
Grief Counseling--8
The Dundies--8
The Alliance--6
The Coup--6
The Initiation--6
The Secret--6
Michael's Birthday--5
Office Olympics-5
Hot Girl--5
Sexual Harrassment--4
Valentine's Day--4
Diversity Day--4
Health Care--3
Basketball-3
Booze Cruise--3
Gay Witch Hunt--3
Boys and Girls---3
Take Your Daughter to Work Day--3
The Fight-3
Conflict Resolution--3
The Job--3
The Fire--2
The Injury--2
Diwali--2
The Return--2
Business School--2
Casino Night--2
The Client--1
Drug Testing--1
Performance Review--1
Branch Closing--1
The Convention--1
The Negotiation--1
Women's Appreciation--1
Beach Games--1
Unknown Ep (1/26-27; 2/12; 3/17; 3/20; 3/24; 4/2) --6

Gah! I know that's a cold-open from S2. Now which one?

That cold open had nothing to do with anything else, too.

It's from The Client I think

^^Yes! This weekend's is easy!

Sat/Sun
June 7/8:

I'm going to be reading their e-mails. E-mail surveillance. All the big companies do it. Increases efficiency. Increases peoductivity. It is a necessary evil. Well, not really evil. It is a necessary good thing.--Michael

The Pilot--13
Grief Counseling--8
The Dundies--8
The Alliance--6
The Coup--6
The Initiation--6
The Secret--6
Michael's Birthday--5
Office Olympics-5
Hot Girl--5
Sexual Harrassment--4
Valentine's Day--4
Diversity Day--4
Health Care--3
Basketball-3
Booze Cruise--3
Gay Witch Hunt--3
Boys and Girls---3
Take Your Daughter to Work Day--3
The Fight-3
Conflict Resolution--3
The Job--3
The Fire--2
The Injury--2
Diwali--2
The Return--2
Business School--2
Casino Night--2
The Client--2
Drug Testing--1
Performance Review--1
Branch Closing--1
The Convention--1
The Negotiation--1
Women's Appreciation--1
Beach Games--1
Unknown Ep (1/26-27; 2/12; 3/17; 3/20; 3/24; 4/2) --6

I'm going to be reading their e-mails. E-mail surveillance. All the big companies do it. Increases efficiency. Increases peoductivity. It is a necessary evil. Well, not really evil. It is a necessary good thing.--Michael

'Nuff said.

^^Exactly!

Today's (my birthday) is from one of my favorite episodes:

Mon, June 9:

There's nothing better than a beautiful day at the beach, filled with sun, surf and diligent note-taking.--Pam

The Pilot--13
Grief Counseling--8
The Dundies--8
The Alliance--6
The Coup--6
The Initiation--6
The Secret--6
Michael's Birthday--5
Office Olympics-5
Hot Girl--5
Sexual Harrassment--4
Valentine's Day--4
Diversity Day--4
Health Care--3
Basketball-3
Booze Cruise--3
Gay Witch Hunt--3
Boys and Girls---3
Take Your Daughter to Work Day--3
The Fight-3
Conflict Resolution--3
The Job--3
The Fire--2
The Injury--2
Diwali--2
The Return--2
Business School--2
Casino Night--2
The Client--2
E-Mail Surveillance--1
Drug Testing--1
Performance Review--1
Branch Closing--1
The Convention--1
The Negotiation--1
Women's Appreciation--1
Beach Games--1
Unknown Ep (1/26-27; 2/12; 3/17; 3/20; 3/24; 4/2) --6

HAPPY BIRTHDAY WEDD!!!

So, tell me, will you be playing any Beach Games during your special day??

^^No, no Beach Games--though it was hot enough for it!

Tues, June 10:

There are certain things a boss does not share with his employees. His salary, that would depress them. His bed.--Michael

The Pilot--13
Grief Counseling--8
The Dundies--8
The Alliance--6
The Coup--6
The Initiation--6
The Secret--6
Michael's Birthday--5
Office Olympics-5
Hot Girl--5
Sexual Harrassment--4
Valentine's Day--4
Diversity Day--4
Health Care--3
Basketball-3
Booze Cruise--3
Gay Witch Hunt--3
Boys and Girls---3
Take Your Daughter to Work Day--3
The Fight-3
Conflict Resolution--3
The Job--3
The Fire--2
The Injury--2
Diwali--2
The Return--2
Business School--2
Casino Night--2
The Client--2
Beach Games--2
E-Mail Surveillance--1
Drug Testing--1
Performance Review--1
Branch Closing--1
The Convention--1
The Negotiation--1
Women's Appreciation--1
Unknown Ep (1/26-27; 2/12; 3/17; 3/20; 3/24; 4/2) --6

^^Yesterday's was E-mail Survelliance (again).

Wed, June 11:

Usually when we talk about sex harrassment, that's the day everyone harrasses me, as a joke.--Pam

The Pilot--13
Grief Counseling--8
The Dundies--8
The Alliance--6
The Coup--6
The Initiation--6
The Secret--6
Michael's Birthday--5
Office Olympics-5
Hot Girl--5
Sexual Harrassment--4
Valentine's Day--4
Diversity Day--4
Health Care--3
Basketball-3
Booze Cruise--3
Gay Witch Hunt--3
Boys and Girls---3
Take Your Daughter to Work Day--3
The Fight-3
Conflict Resolution--3
The Job--3
The Fire--2
The Injury--2
Diwali--2
The Return--2
Business School--2
Casino Night--2
The Client--2
Beach Games--2
E-Mail Surveillance--2
Drug Testing--1
Performance Review--1
Branch Closing--1
The Convention--1
The Negotiation--1
Women's Appreciation--1
Unknown Ep (1/26-27; 2/12; 3/17; 3/20; 3/24; 4/2) --6

Wow, so lately, the answers are pretty much in the quote:

Usually when we talk about Sexual Harrassment, that's the day everyone harrasses me, as a joke.--Pam

Oh and that last one, they missed half the quote. I knew it seemed odd.

Michael: There are certain things a boss does not share with his employees. His salary, that would depress them. His bed, it--- And I am not going to tell them that I'll be reading their e-mails.

^^Yeah, the last few have been easy. Today's is a little change, though.

Thurs, June 12:

What Michael doesn't understand is that when I worked in the fast food industry I was actually commended by management for the three "M"s. McService, McCompetence and McPunctuality.

The Pilot--13
Grief Counseling--8
The Dundies--8
The Alliance--6
The Coup--6
The Initiation--6
The Secret--6
Michael's Birthday--5
Office Olympics-5
Hot Girl--5
Sexual Harrassment--5
Valentine's Day--4
Diversity Day--4
Health Care--3
Basketball-3
Booze Cruise--3
Gay Witch Hunt--3
Boys and Girls---3
Take Your Daughter to Work Day--3
The Fight-3
Conflict Resolution--3
The Job--3
The Fire--2
The Injury--2
Diwali--2
The Return--2
Business School--2
Casino Night--2
The Client--2
Beach Games--2
E-Mail Surveillance--2
Drug Testing--1
Performance Review--1
Branch Closing--1
The Convention--1
The Negotiation--1
Women's Appreciation--1
Unknown Ep (1/26-27; 2/12; 3/17; 3/20; 3/24; 4/2) --6

So, do we get to guess who said it as well as in what episode. Doesn't really matter, because I really don't have a clue.

I'm going to guess Dwight in The Fire

(Maybe Ryan in Business School or The Fire, which would have been interesting for Ryan's character development if we were to have seen that he was once commended by upper management. Might have explained his rapid rise a little easier)

^^Sorry--I forgot to put who said it. It was Dwight, it was Season 2 and it was a deleted scene.