AS said to long ago when asked if Sami loves EJ "Sami hates EJ at the moment but the interesting thing is hate is not the opposite of love so we will see what happens".

What do you think she meant by that?

To me she is saying Sami still loves him despite hating his guts.

Hate is not the opposite of Love indifference is so she might be saying that Sami still loves Ej. I think their is a topic similar to this posted somewhere maybe it was moved to hot topics or something.

There's an old saying that there's a very fine line between love and hate. Both are strong emotions, and to hate someone does indicate that you have some kind of feeling for him or her.

I also think it's possible to love someone, but not like them very much. Perhaps you fell in love with someone because of their good qualities, but sometime down the line, their bad qualities begin to outweigh the good ones. So, you still love that person, but you detest the things they do.

This kind of emotion is often found in domestic violence situations. The true batterer only shows his good side in the beginning. Often, he is a knight in shining armor. As the woman becomes more drawn to him, she doesn't realize that the things he does that make her think he cares, are actually ways of controlling her. Wanting to know where she is every minute because he "worries" about her. Buying her a cell phone so he can contact her every minute of the day. Telling her that her friends, or even her family, don't have her best interests at heart and she needs to trust only him because he is the only person who really loves her and cares for her. She is smitten and falls in love, only to realize that she doesn't like him very much when he starts to hit her for "her" mistakes. By that time, she has been isolated from everyone and has no one she feels she can turn to. While she may still love him, she also hates him for what he has done to her.

NOTE: I used the male as the batterer here, but women can also be batterers.

I actually think Allison is wrong.

Hate is a powerful word and wrongly used many times. Most people have never really felt its true form- what we feel is anger, dislike, or even disgust, but not hatred. But if we're talking about true hatred, in a sense, perhaps you can only feel it towards a specific few. The person either has to be a) a monster like Stephano (or perhaps in real life someone who commited crimes that make your blood boil like Hitler) or someone you loved and trusted and who betrayed that in the worst possible way.

Therefore, love and hate are close in the sense that only someone you love could hurt you so badly that you could truly hate them. The transition could only be triggered by something truly terrible, and even then people make excuses for those they love (the abuse example). Therefore, it usually takes a few terrible events to make it sink in.

However, once you hate someone, then love and close aren't very close at all. That form of hatred really is the opposite of love, and is damn near impossible to destroy. It can only be done by understanding why that person hurt you, accepting that perhaps they may have really had reason for it (or if it's a misunderstanding, they thought they had a reason), and forgiving them. And at that point, you still can't love that person- only wipe the slate. And it would be a really difficult path back to love, because you can no longer trust that person. That's why they say 'Forgive, but not forget'. After all, you trusted them once wholly and they betrayed it. How can you believe that you can ever reach a higher closeness and trust than before? The quote rings true- "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me."

In application to EJ and Sami:

I can not believe that Sami really ever loved EJ. She trusted him at one point, and he betrayed it- and then hurt her and her family again and again so it was hammered into her head (Remember her original denial, and her stating that she really wanted to believe he was her friend). EJ and Sami haven't worked through everything he did to her (actually they haven't worked through anything but the rape), nor have they been peaceful with one another long enough for trust and love to regrow in Sami.

I can not believe that EJ currently loves Sami, although I may accept it to make the show make sense. EJ has never admitted that Sami may have had motive to fear his family and to keep Grace for him. Therefore, in his mind Sami kept his child from him until her death to spite him for his relationship with Nicole. How do you love someone who did that to you? And if he truly believes this, he can not forgive her or move on from the pain she caused him. The writers may make him move on anyways, but this is due to their complete inability to understand human emotions.

This is the deal with Sami and EJ.

Sami doesn't want to be in love with EJ - but she does.

EJ doesn't want to be in love with Sami - but he does.

They are fighting their true feelings. I think that Sami loves Lucas and I think Sami loves Rafe - but I think Sami is IN love with EJ. I think that EJ loves Nicole but EJ is IN love with Sami.

Wow...Cangrl what a great post...so well written. I agree with all your points....Sami and EJ always from the moment they met had this strong sexual attraction...lust is totally different than love. He has an obsessive need to have her and we are not seeing it right now because he's too blinded by what she did to him. Like you said since he hasn't admitted it to himself that his and his family's bad deeds might have affected her ability to tell him the truth regardless of how good a father he claimed to be to Johnny, then how can he ever expect Sami to believe that too. If he truly wanted her love because he loves her, he would have changed many moons ago and not reverted to his old ways...she even told him, you've become the man you never wanted to be. In other words...you've become the man I can't be with. That in itself says a lot of things...he never wanted to be that man? really? then why did he go back to being that man? will she ever be able to trust a Dimera? will she ever be able to be with a man that she can't confide in? will she ever be with Stefano's son?

Does she love him? NO...I don't think so, because frankly if she did then why start a relationship with Rafe? She thought a lot about Elvis in the safe house and even the months she was rooming with Lucas in the cabin, but what happened since she came back to Salem...nothing...no dreams, no fantasies, she's so hucked up with Rafe that she hasn't thought about anyone else romantically ever since her return to Salem. Yeah...she tried to stop the wedding..but once again...it was more about Nicole than anything else. This is Sami...is she wanted to stop the wedding she would have stopped it. It can all be plot driven but it doesn't make sense because the writers keep stringing their fans along with no possible outcome in site. I've heard so many scenarious of how it can come out...the latest. Rafe puts the pieces of the puzzle together and doesn't tell Sami fearing he'd lose her. Well that doesn't make sense because frankly he wants her back and he knows that she would be delighted to have her daughter and let's face it, why wouldn't he want the baby away from the Dimera's. I've also heard the Ejami side of the story where it says that EJ finds out, screams at Nicole-bites her head off-she takes Sydney and escapes...Elvis goes and tells Sami and then they both find a way to reconnect over the kidnapping and find their daughter and rejoice...happy family and Ejami the couple. Well if that were the case then why would we have Nicole confessing all to a comatose Chloe? why? this reallly didn't have to get written in did it? maybe she tells Brady? maybe she tells Lucas? maybe she even tells Dan who knows Baker? I've also heard the double switch which frankly would make the most sense to me...with Stefano knowing his Ejole baby is somewhere with Rolf in an incubator...hense his heir.

Also...knowing Sami does anybody think that she'll trust that EJ didn't know anything? Sami won't believe EJ even if he had his hand on a stack of bibles. We'll see.

Sami and EJ were soul mates from the Moment they First laid eyes on each other you could see it in her face she Loved him and he Loved her when they were showing the S/L of Colleen and Santeen it was There, even though they Fought their Love for each other it was Destined they Couldn't hide their feelings for each other. EJ and Sami Love each other always have Loved each other and I believe TPTB will also see this as well EJAMI ALWAYS FOREVER

Sami has feelings for EJ but I don't think has fully thought about what those are.

She knows she cannot live with EJ or accept him the way he is. Without ever accepting him EJAMI can never be together unless he forsakes his family and goes good.

You could see this in what Sami was telling Stephanie on Friday. Stephanie and Sami are really in the same boat: being attracted to men who are no good for them. They don't want the lives of the Dimeras and the Kiriakises.

Until Rafe's past came up, Sami was in love and happy with Rafe. Now she is not happy but she is still in love with him.

EJAMI fans are rather lucky that Rafe had a past. If Rafe were really just some "normal" guy without the "secret", EJ would be completely off the radar because Sami had the kind of guy that she really wants.

You are the smartest person on the boards today, I agree with you 100%

You cannot hate someone and love them at the same time. How is that even possible? If I hated someone, I would`nt feel any love towards them at all. I would hate thier guts, how can I have compassion to someone I hate? However I do believe that you can love someone but hate what they do. I do not believe that you can hate someone and love someone at the same time, love and hate mean two different things and cannot be put in the same category. I think sami loves Ej ( I don`t care if she ever admits it, her actions prove otherwise) but she hates what he does sometimes.

That is JMO and I am sticking with it

ITA!!...you've taken the words right out of my mouth.

hate and love are the complete opposite of each other. Oh I hate my mom but I love her. Oh I hate my dog but I love him. Oh I hate my girlfriend but I love her. Oh I hate god but I love him. WHAT? That don't even make sense. It's not possible. You can replace love with like and get the same thing. YOu can't hate somebody and be in love with them that's just ridiculous.

I disagree with those who are saying you can't feel hate and love for a person. My grandparents split up before I was born. My grandfather moved on and re-married. My grandmother did not. It was known by everyone in my family that my grandmother basically hated my grandfather.(she definitely acted like she did) The truth was(I found out later in my life) that she never stopped loving him, and I think she hated him, because he moved on. I don't know all the details, but she was very hurt. I believe you can love someone, but hate them for something they do or a way that they live, etc. I think Sami loves EJ. She has never wanted to, because he is a Dimera. I think she hated the fact that she felt like she had to keep Grace a secret, because of EJ getting closer to his father again and working for him again. I believe EJ loves Sami. He hates her right now for keeping Grace a secret from him. I really hope the writers put these two together again.

But hating what someone does isn't the same as hating the person. Single despicable actions aren't always reflective of a person- and if you love a person you see the good in them, so you make excuses for those single actions so that you can pardon them. With love, the good qualities must always make up for the bad-at least in your mind. When being civil or indifferent to one another, the bad can outdo the good but you must find enough good qualities to convince yourself that this person can't be all bad- therefore you don't bother feeling anything to the person at all because the person can go either way. With hate, any good doesn't make up for the bad or cut close.

Your grandfather didn't do anything wrong- they were divorced (to which she must've consented) and free of commitment. Your grandmother knew this, so while a divorce could have hurt her, it didn't represent your grandfather as a despicable person worthy of hate. However, you can only hate the actions of someone so much until you are forced to accept that the actions are reflective of the person and not particular environments (the way that EJ hurt Sami several times in several ways). If your grandmother never stopped loving your grandfather, then she never truly started hating him. And this comes back to how we misuse the word hate. Your grandmother may have been furious, severely hurt, disappointed and disgusted by what your grandfather did. But real hatred is all consuming and leaves no room for anything else, and since your grandfather didn't do anything wrong I can't see how the divorce would trigger it. I'm sorry if it seems I'm analyzing a situation I know nothing about. But even if I'm totally wrong in all of this, you still can't compare a divorce to the things EJ did to Sami- and for that matter, you can't compare it to what Ej THINKS Sami did to him (regarding Grace).

You can be furiously angry at someone,but love them at the same time,in my experience anyways.

Yes you can but you can't hate someone you love. You can pretend you hate them, you can say you hate them but it's not possible. You can't hate someone you love. Hate is a very strong word. Hate is what racist, prejudice, and insane people have in thier hearts. I think hate is a nasty word and a very strong emotion that can cause people to do some nasty things.

In my opinion Sami hates everything that EJ stands for so how can she possibly love him? Lucas and Sami hated each other before, did dispicable things to one another but somehow they're hate grew into a powerful love, why? I see it as years of redemption, longing, and trying to make better people of themselves, years of shedding their layers and growing out of all the stupid stuff they did...with one strong exception....Lucas and Sami were best friends before the hate...and she trusted him (he was the first man she gave herself to after Alan raped her--she trusted Lucas enough to offer herself to him after Alan had her virginity) and he gained that trust by being a loyal friend first. Ej's friendship toward Sami was fake from the beginning, coming with a price and he ultimately achieved that. His friendship wasn't sensere and she in her heart can never trust him, so how can you EVER love a person you don't confide in. That is the difference here...Sami might have a problem with Kate, but she has no qualms telling Lucas everything important to her...because ultimately she knows that he can be trusted. Sami might have the same problem or greater obviously with Stefano but for whatever reason she can't trust EJ long enough to tell him she's pregnant with his child because she doesn't trust EJ or Stefano. Love and trust go hand in hand here and frankly I don't see love without trust and she doesn't trust anything Dimera-hense why she doesn't love EJ.

Awesome post, saved! You summed it up perfectly!

I know from my own experience, that after a break up/divorce, as long as there is anger (sometimes bordering on hate) for the other person, that yes, there are feelings of still caring. Otherwise, they can't bring out your anger.

I agree, the opposite of love is indifference.

I've also learned, from experience, to never date a guy that says awful things about his ex. Why? Cause he's still not over her and you best move on until he doesn't care enough about her any longer, to even bring her up.

OTH, if he's happy for his ex, or they're friends, it's safe to date him! LOL!

You can be angry with someone and sit there saying, "I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!" If you analize it for hours on end you may find you are just really angry with the person. But at that level most of us take the extreme anger as hate. So, although it may not be 'Hate' that we are feeling, we think it is hate that we are feeling. This level of anger that at least 75% of people would identify as hate is what Sami & EJ are going through. So although you may be technically correct in that anger and hate are not the same, and that hate is misused, this definition of hate being anger is something we identify with. I also thnk it is the meaning of the word 'hate' used in the op. Not true hate, but anger hate.

Well that's the thing about human emotions- there's a limited few that have, and so many different causes for them, that you often don't know what's causing what you feel. Anger and hate are easily interchangable. The difference is in what it takes to make someone angry at you/what it takes to make them hate you, as well as the healing process from that. Anyone can make you angry and it often doesn't take that long to move on from it. But getting someone to hate you is usually a methodical process- especially if that person cares enough about you to make excuses. You gotta keep making them angry in ways so bad that they eventually can't forgive you. I can't imagine that Sami didn't hate EJ at one point. He did everything you can ever do to someone to create hatred in them, and I can't imagine her not wishing that he would just disappear. She actually tried to kill him once to protect herself and her family- and when it comes to protecting the people you love if someone is your enemy, he's your enemy. There's no grey. But with Sami, I imagine she's severely confused. One second EJ hurts her in ways worthy of hate, and the next he's her hero (and someone being your hero springs forth positive regards for them). And this happened so many times! If Sami still hated EJ, I'd buy it, because EJ had to save her from the things he/his father initiated. But I can't believe that in that jumble of emotions, actual love could have been born. I'd imagine that Sami has a 'To Heck With It' attitude about EJ and doesn't really care what happens anymore.

The night that Sami made love to EJ and Johnny was conceived said a lot about her emotions. She doesn't just sleep with every Tom, Dick and Harry like a lot of them do.

This is the deal with Sami and EJ ...

If you are looking for the typical romantic loving caring pairing and this is the kind of couple you love this is not the couple for you. EJ and Sami don't do normal, they don't do cute, they don't do sappy, they don't do sweet. What Sami and EJ do do is PASSION. They are firery, they are explosive, they are sexy, they are frustrating, they hate, they love, they blow up, they are charming, they are flirty, they are funny, they are snarky, their looks could kill and their looks can burn. EJ could look at Sami from across the room and she would blush at the thought of him drinking all of her in. Sami may not want to want EJ, Sami may not want to be in love with EJ, she will fight the feelings, she will deny them, bury them, hide them - but deep down in her soul those feelings are burning. But like her subconscious told her (in the form of Colleen) denying them will only make them grow stronger and one night when the storms come you will seak him out. One raining night you find yourself coming to his bed and seaking comfort in his arms.

you took the words right out of my mouth they are Explosive even when they are arguing they have Passion it's just time for sami to finally Utter those three little words actually Four " I Love you EJ Dimera" then all will be well with the world KUDOS on a Great Post EJAMI Forever and always

I always love to debate with you because you are a great debater. However I disagree with the bolded, sami does not hate everything Ej stands for, that is not true at all. How can she hate everything he stands for? Ej stands up for his family so does sami, Ej has done some despicable things so did Sami,sami has had her share of crimes, so did Ej so really what is the difference? Ejami are very similar in a lot of ways, that is the main reason why they are alike. The way I see it, is Sami hates some of the things, Ej has done but she could never hate him. Sami even admitted to Rafe that she would never stop having feelings for Ej, she was taught to hate the dimeras but she can`t. Sami has always been in denial about her feelings for Ej, everyone in salem can see that. I am not going to get into the rape debate, that is beating a dead horse but I will say that it does`nt matter what Ej has done or is capeable off, sami would never hate him. If you hate someone why would you want them with your kids? Sami has said time and time again that Ej is a great father so why would she say that if she hates him? In my experience I have hated a lot of things people have said or done to me, but hating what they have done and the person are two different things. Sami loves Ej but she is denial, I refuse to believe that sami hates Ej, when their past and their current state proves otherwise.

You can love what you wish someone to be, and hate what they actually are. That makes life very frustrating.

Better to let go of what you want, accept the reality, and deal with that. no sense wishing for what you cant' have, or for what that other person can't be. People don't change. short of a major miracle, they don't.

I'm so sorry but you must be confusing the Sydney conception with the Johnny one. For the record....Sami didn't willingly sleep with Ej the night she conceived Johnny and Allie. I call it rape, some call it a deal for Lucas' life but let's face it she didn't go into the car and say, "Common EJ, I want you"....totally the contrary, she called it "rape" herself when she was in the car with EJ...on Sydney's conception, the day in May of 2008...then I'll give you that bit...she was frustrated, fealt jilted by Lucas and she slept with EJ which in turn produced Sydney...and on the bolded text...no she doesn't sleep with any Tom, Dick and Harry but she did in in Dec. of 2006 to save the man she loved and that man wasn't EJ.

Sami was sexually attracted to EJ well before she was jilted by Lucas. Wasn't it John who said to Sami, EJ, Marlena and Lucas - that he was glad that EJ finally nailed her because the sexual tension between the two was so intense. (or something to that nature) And wasn't it Lucas who was always questioned Sami even before the twins were born that he thought she had a thing for EJ? That something inside her had EJ's intitials on it? It was Sami that begged for Lucas to save EJ. It was Sami who couldn't choose between EJ and Lucas as who to shoot. Even Andrea taunted Sami about her lover EJ. Sami's own family saw that she had feelings for EJ. Sami chose EJ almost at every turn. And when it was Sami's turn to defend Lucas - to testify on his behalf she wouldn't do it. But when EJ was going to be deported Sami did everything in her power to help EJ to stay in the country. She even cried when she thought she blew it....It was Sami who told EJ that she needed him. It was Sami who said anything is possible. It was Sami who chose to make love to EJ. It was Sami's own selfconscious who said that she loved EJ and would want EJ - and that to deny it was not only futile but it would only make those feelings grow stronger.

That had me confused as well. Johnny was made out of love??? (maybe if he was Lucas')

Thanks bowiehs for the debating Kudos...I should have joined a debate team in college, right? Anyway the reason I said she hates all he stands for is because of her hatred for the Dimera's. Like it or not, Elvis is a Dimera...he is next in line for the thrown and weather you like it or not--the Dimera's aren't good people...Sami Brady is not a "bad girl to the bone".....however...Elvis has found a way to fall right into the Dimera mold very easily and although he did stand up to Stefano once for whatever reason he hasn't wanted to do it since Stefano came back to Salem in August of last year, why? we don't know..I feel while Stefano is around, Ej will follow the pattern Stef sets. You are right that both Ej and Sami have had their share of crimes but logically speaking since about 2006....Sami has been doing things basically for the good...not the bad...she's changed her thinking a bit. The last time she messed with someone else's lives for the "bad" was when she blackmailed Lexie into telling Carrie that she had an inability to have children. Maybe this is being done on purpose or subconciously by the writers because they want to paint Elvis in a really bad light for the purpose of this storyline...we'll know sooner or later. On Ej being such a good father as Sami supposedly stated, I can't imagine if you have a good father for one child then why hold back the other child from that father if YOU LOVE HIM? If what Ejami fans are saying is true, that she loves him--that is--then why would she hold that back KNOWING it can get her together with him? That is why I will never understand someone's notion that the story or their past says they love each when basically he used her in essence from the get go and then he continued to manipulate her every move through the Santeen/vendetta crap. Maybe in the beginning May of 2006 I would believe that sentiment, she didn't know who he was, he was a new attractive neighbor, they tangoed, she liked him, wanted to date him, they kissed, looked at each, kissed some more and then she realized that he was there for a purpose, he was sent by Stefano for a reason and wham she changed direction in a heartbeat. He later manipulated her and she believed him and that was her downfall as a character..because frankly no one EVER manipulated Sami Brady before EJ and does everyone really think that Sami will let him try to do it again? Remember one thing....she still doesn't trust him, can't confide in him and I think that is one of the biggest hurdles Ejami will EVER need to overcome to make them a couple "in the true sense of the word".

Sami said she had feelings for EJ...what the heck is that? I think it's sexual feelings, not love.

EJ did not love Sami the first time he laid eyes on her nor were they soul mates from their first meeting lol. Same with Sami towards EJ. The facts are well known and even reiterated by Stephano in a discussion with Nicole not that long ago.

EJ came to Salem to get in Sami's pants, period. Not because he loved her, he didn't even know her yet, but because he was helping to exact more DiMera pain upon a Brady. Then "supposedly" EJ fell in love with Sami along the way. I wonder when? Was it while he was blackmailing her? Was it after he raped her? Or maybe after he set her up for his fake death and put her in the hospital? I wonder if he fell in love with her while trying to off her family members? Maybe he saw the light while shooting John at point blank range, or maybe it was later when he was helping to steal his kidney and kidnapping Kayla, forcing her to perform the surgery. Maybe it was when he was faking his paralysis or setting up the scheme with the fake IRS agent, or maybe it was when he was keeping the truth from Sami (again) about how they were married, when the annulment had actually been done legally. How ridiculous to me that the writer's have even gone anywhere near a "love" type relationship between these two after all of this has transpired. Nothing that EJ has done "for" Sami has been about love IMO, otherwise he wouldn't have done them!

EJ is obssessed with Sami, nothing more, nothing less. I have never seen love mutually between these two characters. Never have. And I've certainly never seen any chemistry between them, never have, never will. EJ is the anti-love for Sami if anything.

As for the original question, I think that there have been a lot of good answers. I don't believe that you can still be IN love with someone and hate them at the same time. I think that you can hold feelings of love because you once did in cases where couples have been together for decades (not months, or in EJami's case never lol). There's a reason that you would have grown to hate a person, and it would have to be something pretty bad in order to truly hate someone that you were once in love with. I also believe that you can care about that person still in the sense of just being a human being, but that doesn't mean that you still are in love with them, or want to share a life with them.

As for the joke of the storyline that was Santeen, that was the writer's way of trying to give Ejami's, EJ & Sami, without actually putting them together (which they have still chosen not to do thank god). Santo and Colleen were not EJ and Sami. Keep reminding yourself how Santeen ended. She ran away from him when she found out he was lying to her about the real state of his marriage, and he ended up living a lonely miserable life. I can only hope for the same for EJ if he continues to obssess over someone that he can never have.

On the first bolded part...that was after she slept with him in May of 2008 not December of 2006 (when the twins were conceived)..I don't know if you were watching then...but Sami didn't freely walk into the open arms of EJ and do him then...sorry you are wrong.

On the second bolded part...you are wrong again...Sami ran after Lucas while in bed with EJ...she left EJ in bed and ran like a bat out of hell. Still weeks/months later she was still begging Lucas to take her back and in a last ditch effort after the beat up he endured in jail that led him to the hospital she told him, "I know what I want and I want you"...he just couldn't move on with the fact that she slept with the guy that he was willing to spend 10 years in jail to protect her from.

On the third bolded part...Sami chose to make love to EJ in May of 2008 when they conceived Sydney NOT, I repeat NOT in December of 2006 when the twins were conceived. Read transcripts...look up Youtube...but she was forced into sex in Dec. of 2006 to save Lucas life. That is fact.

Perfectly put!

Nothing I said was inaccurate. NOTHING! Please re-read! I know you want to bring up Dec of 2006 to support your position - but Sami chose EJ over and over and over again. She made love to him in May 2008 - she was sexually attracted to EJ before Lucas told her to move on and when he did send her that E-mail it took her just mere hours to do just that - why because she had already MOVED ON! John noticed it - the sexual tension was evident! Why was it that months before the twins were born that Lucas noticed that Sami and EJ had something going on? Even Lucas noticed it!

Nice summery. You forgot switching Belle and Mimi's embryos, threatening Will, trying to force her into a surgeory that would take her stem cells, blackmailing her into marrying him, and putting Lucas in a freezer among others. See this is what I don't get: How can you possibly claim to love someone and do all of this to her and her loved ones? And yet, I still buy that EJ does love Sami in a twisted way. I buy that his training as a Dimera makes him go after all he wants (although I don't buy that he doesn't know any better). What I will really never understand is how Sami could have ever fallen for a man who did all this to her and the people she loved.



Look at your list: Frusterating, hate, blowing up, snarky, looks can kill, explosive vs. sexy, love, charm, flirt, funny. A relationship with all of those is one massive headache. Love takes time to grow and settle- it can never do this when it's being uprooted all the time. Sami would be living on the edge at the least, but it gets old and Sami got tired of doing this dance. A relationship that hurts more than it loves, presents danger at every corner, and puts you in a situation where you have to play hush hush when your family is being victimized isn't worth it.



Sami does stand up for his family- this is exactly the problem because when EJ stands up for his family it's at the expense of hers. The difference between EJ and Sami is that Sami has, for one, matured. She has always wanted to be a better person and she finally did it. The second is that Sami didn't direct all of her crimes at EJ and hope to earn his love by doing that. Furthermore, when Sami committed crimes it was never for her own pleasure the way that some EJ's have been (like the embryo switch for Belle and Mimi). She benifitted from them, but she never enjoyed them.



Sexual attraction isn't love!

I think it was when he turned in the hallway after leaving her apartment towards the beginning of things - I remember my mom and I saying, "Look, he's falling for her for real."

I do not see it as obsession, but as a love he can't deny no matter how hard he is now trying. You do not see it that way, which is fine. World would be boring if we were all the same. (That pretty much sums up my opinion on the rest of the post, so I won't be redundant & continue to say I disagree.)

Sami has NEVER chosen EJ. You may want to believe that and it is fine but I don't see it that way at all. She never wanted to willingly sleep with EJ when Johnny was conceived. The fact that she looked miserable and was crying so much should have been a tip off. And the one time she willingly had sex with EJ, she was distraught over losing Lucas, and ran after Lucas telling him how much she loved him. So I see nothing at all to support your position that it is EJ Sami loves and has chosen. She has chosen Lucas and now Rafe over him time and time again.

Maybe those were tears of joy because she couldn't hold back her sexual tension anymore. either way there were tears.

See I keep getting reminders of why the thought of this coupling is so twisted. And totally agree about Santeen. If I remember correctly there was an interview that one writer did that said that is why they created Santeen. To put Ejami together without actually doing it.

Oh boy....you really don't have to yell...lolol.....anyway on the other bolded part and the rest of your post...explain to me one thing....why didn't she sleep with him in the span of time between Feb (when Lucas went to jail) and May 19? that was 3 months....she could have done it every day for 60 days and she didn't until she got the email from Lucas and remember one thing too...Sami had to upstage Nicole too who was trying to get to EJ and in the end she did..that is their relationship Sami and Nicole will go back and forth trying to upstage each other...it's how they function...always has been..

Also Lucas might have noticed sexual tension between the two and that is not love...I'll say it again...you can have strong lustful feelings for someone and be in love with someone else (that is how adultery happens). Also I bet Lucas now sees what she said to him all along that she doesn't love EJ (feelings aside)...hense she's with Rafe and supposedly professing her love for him every 4 minutes.

Thanks Tibi....I see I'm not the only one that sees the Sami never WILLINGLY chose EJ.....

nope! Maybe we should start a list of all the time Sami choose anything over EJ. Starting with the first time when she chose her family -Lucas and Will- over EJ when he made her choose. And that was right after Lucas and Will destroyed Ejami's one and only date. Or how about when the doctor said it was okay for Sami to have sex again after having the twins. She was "married" to EJ, but I know it wasn't him she choose to make love to that night... 

That answer is NO. A person who loves someone can hate something the other did. But a person can not love and hate someone at the same time. That makes no sense at all. Sort of like "can a person be dead and alive at the same time?"

[quote name='kayc' post='4044474' date='Aug 17 2009, 08:03 PM']Maybe those were tears of joy because she couldn't hold back her sexual tension anymore. quote]

Here it is: someone actually admitting that sami/elvo fans think Sami secretly ENJOYED being raped. Or "dealt" with, whatever. This is just a horrid idea: the guy forces himself on the girl (and since elvo himself said "I forced you", there's no duel interpretation there), but she actually gets turned on during the act, then actually LOVES him.

Note to Johnny: You want her, take her, she'll love it.

This whole sordid ejamo mess has been insulting and WRONG from the get-go.

Dool is insulting and WRONG to keep up this crap.

Excellent post. You summed up Sami and EJ perfectly. And, the way you said....they hate, they love....kind of explains the love/hate thing everyone is discussing. It's not as if they are feeling both emotions at the "exact" same time. They are both emotions that are part of their relationship. Because there is or was love, the hurt and anger is intense and there are feelings of hate. That's not to say that feelings of love aren't still there in some way or they can't come back with forgiveness. And yes, people have said that maybe some people are confusing anger with hate. Maybe......I'm just talking about the way people might describe their feelings. Hate is a strong word, and maybe it should not be used. It may be more like intense anger, hurt, etc. People can say what they want about this couple, but one thing I would like to say is they are never dull. I wish I could say that about the rest of the show.

Thanks for answsering Firstfall.

So bascially you are saying that you think EJ was in love with Sami while he was doing all those heinous things to her and her family. Well, I will appreciate your viewpoint, but for me... I could never call that love, I could never call EJ's actions towards Sami one's of love, nor is that a "love" that I would ever want to experience.

Sorry folks! But I never liked Sami with any of those guys in her past. I'd been watching DOOL since 1987. I was certainly a Jack & Jen fan till they left the show.

Sami was once in love with Lucas, no doubt about that. But this thing with EJ? Oh! pls. there's no love between these two. Johnny was conceived because EJ forced himself on her. Then Lucas pushed her away. She jumped in bed with EJ, not because she was in love with the guy, but because she missed Lucas. She used him! and I would not call that lovemaking. It was just pure lust and nothing more!

Then, a hero comes along! This one Agent Rafe Hernandez whose looks and body is to die for, arrived in the safehouse to save the damsel in distress. Well ! I think Days execs hit a jackpot hiring Galen Gering to play the part. Sami and Rafe aka SAFE are the reason why I still watch the show. Their playful, cutesy banters are like breath of fresh air. I always look forward to seeing them everyday do their stuff. There's that intensity and fire in the way the actors interact with each other. They have great chemistry together! Sami and Rafe - they're the real deal !! The way they look at each other, do things together, now that's what I call LOVE !!

I hate what the writers are doing to them right now ! But, everyone knows, super couples always will have trials and tribulations. There's never smooth sailing for them. So, we SAFE fans will be patiently waiting for the day when Sami and Rafe will be in each others arms once again!!!

Are you reading this, writers? We want Sami and Rafe back!!!!!!!! Thank you!

SAFE 4ever!

Um, yes. That's basically what I said. It sorta plays into the whole "wanna make daddy proud" arguments over Stefano's influence and EJ's perceived requirement of 'family' over everything meaning DiMera family to him. I see it as all part of his journey - I see it as a similar, albeit a bit more dramatic, version of things that Lucas and Kate have done to Sami.

People can and have done horrible things to those they love for whatever reason. Now, I may not want a relationship like that in real life, but I think it makes good drama and it's something I want to see on my tv.

Sure they can.

Ask Ej and Sami.

That's why Ej and Sami aren't your average, everyday, seen them all before couple. They're breaking the old tired mold and making a new exciting one.

Not every couple have to be Romeo and Juliet, Snow White and Prince Charming. Nor do they require flowers and candy.

There are a myriad of couples for those fans, Ejami are for the the rest of us who like a little jalapeno.

My thoughts exactly!!! I have experienced this with my second dead ex hubby, and although I had known him most of our younger lives, the only good thing to come out of that was our daughter Jasmine.