Jon Bon Jovi with Foo Fighters
09.30.06
From SNLWiki
32nd Season Premiere: Dane Cook/The Killers
Cold Opening: Richard Eckstrom for Comptroller The 32nd season opens up with a bored President George W. Bush makes small talk in the background as Richard Eckstrom talks about running for comptroller of South Carolina. President Bush ends up annoying everybody by the end.
Opening Montage
Starring
- Fred Armisen
- Will Forte
- Bill Hader
- Darrell Hammond
- Seth Meyers
- Amy Poehler
- Maya Rudolph
- Andy Samberg
- Jason Sudeikis
- Kenan Thompson
- Kristen Wiig
Musical Guest, The Killers
And your host, Dane Cook
Dane Cook's Monologue
The Audience is making Dane Cook feel great! He is so thrilled to be hosting the season opener of SNL! Dane Cook performs stand-up comedy for his monologue. His stand-up includes talks about negative people.
TSA Homeland Security Refresher
Two members of the Department of Homeland Security talk to the "elite" of new workers about identifying liquids and gels at airport check-outs. But this new class is very confused and ask ridiculous questions!
Hugo Chavez Political Roundup
Hugo Chave hosts the Banana Republic version of the "McLaughlin Group."
SNL Digital Short: Cubicle Fight
When a new worker's boss tells him about his new work, he finds that he has to share a cubicle with someone else. Two men enter, one man leaves. They fight for the cubicle. But, what will they use for weapons? Office supplies of course.
Al Pacino Checks His Bank Balance
Al Pacino calls Wells Fargo operator to check his balance to make sure he has enough money to order an astronaut mattress.
Musical Performance
The Killers perform When We Were Young
Weekend Update with Amy Poehler, Seth Meyers, and Brian Williams??!?!
Finally, after a whole summer, the question about who is going to co anchor the update desk with Amy is answered. It's Brian Williams, of course! Oh, wait, they went in a different direction. Seth Meyers is the co-anchor. Bill Clinton and Condoleeza Rice make amends for his remarks about the Bush administration's anti-terrorism policy. Senator George Allan uses gobbledygook language to cover his racist "macaca" remark. Dustin Diamond also comes to the update desk to coment on sex tapes he distributed so he can save his house!
Water Coolers
A pair of Poland Spring delivery boys get in trouble when someone who works at Poland Spring comes to see whats up. Apparently, many people's orders have not been delivered, and the orders were in these two men's routes. This leads to trouble. She opens the closet and hundreds of empty canteens fall, seeing to the two boys being guilty.
Musical Performance
The Killers perform "Bones"
Farrah Fawcett for Ocean Save
Farrah Fawcett rambles incoherently for a minute before chasing the camera across the studio and interesting herself into another sketch.
Closing Time
At 2 o'clock a.m, belligerant bar owners Deuce and T-Bird turn on the lights and pressure everyone to leave immediately. Hey, its closing time! Get out!
Geico
Whitney Houston tells a Geico Customer's story to make it more interesting. But, don't you think her story is going a little bit off the page?
Goodnights
Well, the 32nd season premiere is over. Goodnight! Dane Cook wants to thank the Killers and the cast!
